Assemble
by Space-Dweeb
Summary: Avengers drabble series. Most will be humorous, but a few might be serious.
1. Fury's Head

Natasha Romanoff hated Tuesdays. Nothing seemed to go right on a Tuesday.

The Black Widow sank onto the couch in her room at Avengers Tower blissfully. She had just returned from a mission in Bangladesh, one in which she had spent the entire mission running and shooting. She needed a break.

Unfortunately for her, she was reminded that Hawkeye had the contact information for the tower when JARVIS suddenly projected his face in front of her.

"Nat," he said excitedly, "You know how I've always said that the Director's head is unnaturally shiny? Well...I caught Fury waxing his head." The Black Widow shook her head with an annoyed smirk. The archer never ran out of stories. "No, really!" He said when he saw her move to cancel his call. "His wax is called-" Natasha touched a button on the armrest and cancelled the transmission. She again allowed herself to lay back and try to rest.

"He's not kidding. I'm looking at the bottle of wax." Iron Man's voice blared over the PA. "It's called, 'Official Lavender'. Isn't that weird? It's wax, but it's called lavender." The Widow cancelled the PA to her room before Stark could continue.

Her phone began to ring. It was Steve Rogers. At least she could trust _him _to have some serious news. Reluctantly, she answered the phone.

"I don't like to admit this, but...they're right. I saw Fury spray it on his scalp. It was kind of terrifying, actually."

She exclaimed aloud as she threw her phone across the room. Then there was a knock on the door. "Bruce, I swear that if you have something to say about Fury's shiny head, I will kill you."

The genius/rage monster entered her room with his hands raised.

"Easy, Natasha. I was just asking if the guys were spamming you as much as me." Romanoff nodded unhappily, and Bruce nodded. Then, Bruce caught sight of something outside her window and stared.

Outside her window, flying, was Thor.

"Come with me, fellow Avengers!" The Asgardian boomed. "Let us discover together the head of the Bald One!" Natasha looked to Bruce, who returned it with a resigned affirmative. She sighed and walked to the window, then opened it.

"We'll meet you there." She said.

* * *

Natasha walked towards Fury's office. She had left Bruce to deal with the men at the front desk, quickly flashing her agent identification before moving through. It was sadistic, but she was in need of a pick-me-up.

She heard the footfalls of a man running toward her, and was able to identify that it was her partner before he rounded the corner.

"Nat! They told me you were here." He said with a large grin when he saw her. He grabbed one of her hands and began to pull her along as though he were an impatient child. "You have to see this. He's doing it again." He said excitedly. Despite herself, Natasha felt herself becoming excited just from being near the boyish agent that was still struggling to make her go faster.

Finally she relented and the two SHIELD agents ran toward Fury's office. Fifty yards away, Clint slowed to a walk and held a finger of his free hand to his lips in a 'shush' gesture. The Black Widow merely rolled her eyes at him. They reached the door of his office, and Hawkeye opened it a sliver.

He gestured for Natasha to look through, and after a moment's hesitation she did.

Fury was waxing his forehead.

It was hilarious.

She looked up at where Clint was peeking just above her and saw he was about to lose it. She heard a _thump_ on the other side of the office and a muffled,

"Odin's Beard!" and that was all the highly trained assassin near her could handle. Clint's shoulders started to shake and Natasha put a hand on one of his shoulders in warning.

Quiet laughter began to come from Barton, until another _thump_ sounded, and the archer began laughing extremely loudly. Then he couldn't stop. The assassin fell on the ground because he was laughing so hard.

Romanoff heard another exclamation - this one coming from Fury - and grabbed her partner by the scruff of his collar to drag him away. She made it twenty feet dragging Clint's dead weight behind her before Fury slammed into the hallway, and the two agents were immediately sprinting away from their mentor, both laughing as they ran.

They heard some gunshots, but left behind their companions. They passed Bruce at the gate and Natasha shouted,

"Run!" before they breezed by. They didn't stop running until they were ten miles away from Fury. Then they boarded a train bound for...they didn't know where, they were just on it. Anywhere but where they were would do.

It took two hours, but the two Avengers returned to Avengers Tower when they felt it was safe(and after Clint had bought some food). Inside, they found four exhausted teammates lounging in the living room.

Barton took the shopping bags Natasha had been carrying and took them to the kitchen while she went to join the rest of the team. Everyone sat silently.

"So...has everyone seen it?" Steve asked with a slightly dazed look in his eyes.

"No." Bruce said. He had been imprisoned by the agents at the front desk, interrogated by Fury, and endured a car ride with Maria Hill before he made it back to Avengers Tower. And he hadn't even seen what everyone kept saying was worth the trouble.

"Don't worry, Green Bean, I got video." Hawkeye said as he entered the room with a bag of chips. He sat down next to the armrest Natasha was sitting on and offered her some.

The silence was only punctuated by Clint's eating.

"We should do that again sometime." Tony said from where he sat. This was generally agreed upon by the team - even Bruce, once he had seen Barton's video - before they scattered to their own rooms. "I need to go fix my helmet. And my elbow joints. And...everything else. See you." Tony said before leaving.

"I need to meditate."

"I must tell Jane Foster of the adventure I experienced today."

Steve and Clint started a movie, an old John Wayne film, and both fell asleep. Natasha finished the movie, cleaned up Barton's bag of chips, and made both men leave for their own rooms to sleep in.

Natasha Romanoff hated Tuesdays. Nothing seemed to go right on a Tuesday. But sometimes, Tuesdays could be a lot of fun.


	2. Tony Gets A Cold

"Jarvis. Quarantine the lab. I'm broken. I'm dying. Don't let anyone else in here." Iron Man's hand weakly dropped from the machine he was working on as he felt his life begin to slip away.

"We're all in here already." Hawkeye said with his arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.

"And all you have is a cold." Black Widow finished.

"Nope. I'm dying. Get out of here, all of you." Tony wasn't even acting this time-he thought he was going to die. Captain America walked towards him and put his hand on Tony's shoulder.

"It's alright-"

"No!" Tony screamed and ran for the door.

"Hey." Banner said and stood in the doorway. Tony bowled over him and continued out the door.

"Did that...really just happen?" Clint asked, pointing at the door.

"I'm afraid so." Captain America replied with a sigh. Everyone eventually followed Iron Man to his room, where they stood outside.

"Tony!" Bruce yelled at the door.

"Get away! I can't fix this!" The Avengers remained silent for a moment.

"I say we leave him." Natasha said with a shrug, her motion quickly being seconded by Clint. Steve looked at them with is _Tony's freaking out and he needs our help_ stare.

"How do you do that? I haven't even _done_ anything and I feel guilty!" The archer exclaimed unhappily.

"Tony, open the-" the Captain's order was interrupted when Bruce leaned next to the console and hot-wired the door. The Avengers rushed into the room before the Iron Man had the chance to send his robot minions for them. Bruce and Clint tackled him quickly before he could make a run for the door.

"No! You're killing yourselves!" Tony yelled dramatically. The two Avengers held him down and Captain America walked toward his sick counterpart.

"Tony, you're fine. You have a flu. Nobody's going to die." He said this cautiously as he slowly stepped toward the man. Stark began to sob quietly and he sagged between the two men holding him, forcing them to bear the brunt of all his weight.

"Gack," Clint exhaled as Tony collapsed. "Lay off the cookies, Stark." Bruce discreetly stepped out from under Tony's arm and left the man in Hawkeye's care.

"What's the point?" Tears glittered in the scientist's eyes. "I'm dying already. I feel myself getting faint. I'm...I'm drifting..." Tony slumped even further down.

"Even Mean Green's been sick before." Bruce said from the side of the bed.

"Nope. Not like this. I'm _dying_."

"Can someone help me?" Hawkeye grunted. Steve threw Tony onto the bed and strapped him down with Bungee chords Natasha had retrieved.

"Jarvis, track down some cold medicine for Tony and figure out what strain of cold he has."

"Yes, sir." Jarvis answered.

"It's too late!" Tony screamed as they walked away.

An hour later Captain America returned to Stark's room with cold medicine and hot chocolate. He entered the room to find a defeated billionaire waiting for the death throes to claim him. He knew that's what he had found because Tony immediately told him so.

"Drink this." Steve offered Tony the hot chocolate. As Iron Man gulped what he was sure were to be his last taste of any sort of warm liquid, Steve quietly tucked the empty cold medicine packet behind his back so that Stark would be unaware of his "treachery". After a while of silence, Steve looked at his friend.

"You were right, Tony. You're dying. Everyone else is evacuating the building, and I'm going to join them soon. I just need you to rest here until you slip away so that we can safely dispose of your body. You're dying a hero's death." Tony nodded without responding to the captain's words and Steve stood. He turned and saluted before leaving the room. "This country owes you a large debt, Mr. Stark."

Tony eventually drifted away.

* * *

Stark emerged from his room three hours later, feeling fine. He ran joyfully toward the spacious living room the Avengers shared, eager to contact the others. He ran through his message to them in his head several times before passing the assassin pair on his way to the nearest phone.

Then Tony stopped and turned around. Clint and Natasha were sitting in the living room playing some obscure form of poker when they were supposed to have evacuated with the others. At first, the hero was touched. Then he saw the lazily disposed-of cold medicine containers sticking out of the garbage can and was confused. Then the realization dawned on him.

Clint looked up when he heard Tony stomping back toward he and Natasha and he patted her hand(which was holding yet another winning card hand)in warning of the genuise's approach.

"He lied to me?" Tony shouted. "The Capsicle, of all people, lied to me?" His tone rose in volume and pitch.

"Nat, I think it's time to bolt." Hawkeye said quietly. Looking into her eyes, he saw the confirmation. Clint stood and walked toward Tony with his hands raised.

"Tony, I just want you to know," Barton saw the Black Widow stealthily retreat toward the door and hold it open for him, "...that it was all Cap's idea."

The assassin dove over the armchair he had recently occupied and somersaulted through the doorway that Romanoff was propping open. As soon as he was on his feet, the two ran.

Fortunately for them, Stark's true target entered the room as they fled, accompanied by Bruce.

"Cap?!" Tony yelled. Steve looked up and turned tail in full retreat.

"It was for your own good!"

Tony _huff_-ed and dropped into the center of a sofa with his arms crossed sullenly. They were probably all in on the conspiracy against him.

And so they would _all_ pay.


	3. Tony's Revenge

_**Author's Note: So, I won't normally post two-chapter stories, but the cold didn't quite feel complete. So here is the completion. Also, any criticism would be helpful in writing this. Reviews are love!**_

Tony fumed in his lab. It had been a week since what the staff(JARVIS) were calling 'The Cold Incident'. The others quickly adopted the name. Not one of them knew how soon Tony's 'Incident' was going to become 'The Cold War'.

The billionaire stopped pouting long enough to look down at the blueprints he had drawn up. It was of Dr. Banner's floor. As far as Stark was concerned, Bruce was the least involved in the plot to 'cure' him of his 'dramatics'. That didn't mean he wouldn't pay, it just meant that he would pay less. And first. The hero knew that once the doctor had befallen his fate, the others would be more wary, but they wouldn't realize how bad it was going to get for them.

Now all he had to do was lay the trap.

* * *

Bruce entered his room after a long day at the lab. He was no closer to finding a cure for the Big Guy, but being able to play with Stark's toys didn't hurt. In fact, the scientist sometimes found the practice soothing.

Today, however, had been particularly taxing. He thought that he had found the cure, but it turned out to be an extremely complex and volatile molotov cocktail instead. Only Steve's shield had saved him.

Banner continued to wipe soot from his face as he left the bathroom and entered his room. He walked past something on his bed without a second glance.

The doctor passed this mystery item twice more before realizing there was something foreign about his room.

Bruce quietly resolved never to let the assassins or soldiers he surrounded himself with know about his inattentiveness. He knew that would only end in ridicule. Banner moved toward what looked like a sad, twisted little teddy bear. Bruce suddenly jumped on the stuffed creature and moved it around, waiting for it to do something dangerous. When it did nothing, Bruce sat on his bed somewhat disappointed.

Then the door to his closet burst open and one of Tony's droids blasted silly-spray all over Bruce's room.

* * *

Steve sat in the kitchen pouring over a _Futura_ magazine in an attempt to learn something about new technology. He was hopelessly out of his depth. He heard the door open with a swish and Bruce walked into the room. At least, he thought it was Bruce. It was more of a massive clump of neon-colored oily string that was comparable in size to the Hulk. Banner sat across from the captain with an audible squish. Rogers opened his mouth to comment.

"Don't." Bruce grunted. Steve hesitated, closed his mouth, and continued reading his magazine

* * *

A week had passed since Bruce had been hit with the silly-spray. During that week, Natasha had fallen into a vat of cooking oil and all of Clint's belongings had been replaced by a massive bird nest that dominated the center of his room and stores of cans of worms spread throughout the rest of it. It wasn't until two days later that the archer found several large, robotic, meat eating birds living in his nest. Steve was the only one that had been left unscathed.

That made the soldier very, _very_, nervous.

Rogers had taken up the habit of jumping at everything - shadows, loud doors, car horns. He'd tried to talk with Tony several times, but the scientist merely smiled darkly and stirred whatever drink was in his hand at the time.

Steve mulled over his current state of mind, and how he was losing it, in the kitchen. He decided that he should at least work out in the training room. Tony wouldn't risk his perfect building just to play a petty prank, he was sure.

He was fairly certain.

He thought.

Steve turned away from the training room and headed back to his own room, hoping to find solace there. Then the captain thought better of it and simply left the building altogether.

* * *

Tony cackled as he watched the flustered soldier on the camera in his lab. He leaned back and wiped a tear from one eye as he saw Steve nearly sprinting through the lobby to get out of the building.

Stark laughed even harder at the sight of Steve not waiting for a cab and merely running from the tower.

Then the genius howled at the ingenuity of Roger's punishment. Tony had been unable to think of a suitable return to what Steve had done to him, and he had found it consuming his thoughts no matter where he was. Tony was a very driven man when he decided to be. He hadn't noticed that his planning was making Steve paranoid for several days, but quickly decided that was better recompense for his crimes than any Tony could have devised. He let the captain sweat.

Tony was never happier with an evil plot.


	4. Thor Doesn't Get Social Media

Thor stared at a laptop before tapping, or at least what he thought was tapping, several keys. He repeated the process when his first attempt yielded no results. His 'taps' grew in volume as he tried to fix his errors, but he only became more confused. Finally, the Asgardian resorted to hitting the keyboard with a closed fist and hoping for the best.

Tony finally emerged from the kitchen where he had been trying to wait out the storm.

"What's up Blondie?" He asked as he approached the larger man.

"This 'typing' you humans employ, it is...problematic. All I wish to do is send a greeting, but your symbols continue to arrange themselves in the incorrect order."

"That's because you're using your whole hand to type, big guy. You have to use individual fingers. Gently."

Thor nodded vigorously and attempted to resend the message with renewed energy. Quickly he was driven to slapping the keyboard again.

"Thor! What did I say? _Individual fingers, _remember?" Tony demonstrated on an imaginary keyboard. Thor nodded again, then seemed to try to hit every key on the laptop. "Okay, okay. _I'll_ write the message for you. Give me the laptop." Stark held his hand out for the Asgardian to hand it to him.

"No. I can do this. No foe has bested me, and this plastic container of words and charts will not be the first to do so!" Tony gave up and walked out exasperatedly.

The next to enter the room was Steve. He found the Asgardian desperately trying to write a message on the computer Stark had given him, and felt compelled to help. Unfortunately, Steve was as out-of-depth as Thor.

"Okay, this is similar to a type-writer. I have experience with those. So..." Steve caught sight of the slender keys and laptop they were attached to. "...So we need to find the person you're trying to write to, and..." There were a few keys the soldier didn't recognize, but they couldn't be too hard to figure out, right? He pushed one of them and the screen filled with blue. Another button press and the screen went blank. Steve was quickly getting overwhelmed.

Rogers began to stutter as he tried to figure out just what he was supposed to do, and how he could teach Thor that. Hawkeye happened upon them at that point.

"Hold on, guys. I can make this better." The archer quickly ran out of the room. He returned in two minutes with a large bowl of popcorn and threw himself down in an armchair across from the two men with the laptop. Steve looked at him questioningly, and Clint responded, "What? I didn't say it'd be better for you," and threw a piece of popcorn in his mouth. Steve wished that Natasha weren't on a mission. Clint was always more easily dealt with when his partner in crime could keep him under control.

Steve glared at the assassin for a moment (said glare was responded to with a cheeky grin) before turning back to Thor's computer. Barton simply watched the two struggle for ten full minutes before anyone else entered the room. Both blonde Avengers looked up, hoping to see their rescuer enter from the hallway.

Bruce came into the room absent-mindedly whistling an obscure tune. He walked straight past the group without noticing them.

"Hey Green Bean!" They heard Tony call from the kitchen. Barton happily chewed a handful of popcorn as Steve held the bridge of his nose between two fingers.

"Don't you have some bad guys to kill?" The captain asked.

"Not for another...," the archer checked his watch. "Actually, yes. I'm late for a debriefing. Thanks for the reminder, Gramps!" Hawkeye jumped from the couch, letting popcorn sprawl across the floor, and sprinted to the elevator.

"We're the same age!" Steve shouted in return.

The captain turned back to the laptop and glared at it. He could beat this. He was a ninety-something man that actually _could_ claim that he was as only as old as he felt. He'd defeated Nazis, aliens, and who knows what all else. This laptop would not beat him. It would **_not._**_  
_

Definitely not.

* * *

Sam Wilson made picked his way through the Avengers tower. After the debacle with SHIELD, Mr. Stark had been kind enough to take the pilot in and house him while he helped Cap out. They'd even taken Sam out a couple of times when they needed some backup. He was currently finishing up a particularly long day of staring at an empty building he _thought_ might have housed a nearly 100 year-old Russian assassin, and really needed at least two hours' sleep. As he walked through the living room he saw captain and the viking sprawled out on a couch with a laptop at Thor's feet and a scrawled letter behind them.

Sam knelt down and collected the laptop and the letter. The hand-writing was somewhat difficult to read, but it was for the most part a one-sided conversation written to someone named "Dearest Jane". A glance at the laptop showed the Facebook profile of Jane Foster and at least twenty failed attempts at contacting her.

The former soldier quickly typed out the letter, placed the laptop in Thor's hands with the top shut, and left for his room.

10:00 AM found the man far too quickly, and was heralded by a booming,

"I HAVE DONE IT! THE MIGHTY THOR HATH BESTED THE...TOP OF LAPS!"

He entered the living room and found Thor bouncing around not unlike a small child at receiving a new toy. Steve was on the ground, apparently having been startled out of his resting place. The captain stood and looked at the laptop while Clint and Natasha entered the room rubbing their eyes. Tony looked in from the kitchen, then snorted and finished his fifth highly caffeinated beverage.

"You still have to send it." Natasha pointed out. Sam turned away while Thor proudly babbled about being able to type in his sleep. As Sam passed the threshold back into his room and the door begin to slide shut, he heard Steve say,

"Hey! Where'd it go?"


	5. Taskmaster

**_Author's Note: So I got a request to do something more pain-related, and I'm finally getting around to it. Sorry about the long wait. Also, this one will be another two-parter. I know I said they'd mostly be one shots, but I guess I sort of lied._**

Everything was quiet.

For a moment. Then that silence was shattered by the sounds of a super soldier and a super villain clashing. Then silence regained dominance.

Things had been going that way for quite a while. Somehow, a joker named "Taskmaster" had gotten the drop on the most powerful team of heroes this side of the Justice League. They had something he wanted. He decided to take it. They decided to stop him.

Unfortunately, Taskmaster came very well prepared.

Banner had already taken a long drink of his "ZzzQuil" laced hot chocolate and headed for bed. He wouldn't be up for at least six hours, unless somebody woke the big guy. Strangely enough, the unanimous decision was quickly made that that was a last resort option. So the Avengers fought Taskmaster without their heaviest hitter. Then, Stark had followed the egomaniac straight through an improvised EMP field that had shorted out all of his armor systems.

That left them down two.

When Thor took a nap after being on the receiving end of a surprising number of falling steel beams, he left them down to the three former SHIELD agents.

"_Clint, Natasha, do either of you have eyes on the target?_" Captain America asked quietly over their communication system.

"_Nothing. We have him pinned on the fourth floor, but other than that it's like he's invisible. This guy knows our tower better than we do_." The spy answered.

"Got that right. I'm finding all kinds of rooms I didn't even know existed up here." Hawkeye answered both of them.

"_Great. None of us have any contact? Stay frosty, people. Taskmaster is more dangerous than we gave him credit,"_ Steve said. "_And keep your eyes - " _he was silent for a moment, then suddenly shouted, "_Contact, contact! East corridor, moving fast."_

Neither assassin gave a verbal response, but both immediately moved to intercept positions. Clint found a wall between himself and the easiest route to the East corridor. He took this opportunity to test out one of Tony's new explosive arrow heads. Luckily for Barton, the arrow beat the wall and he burst into the hallway that the Captain had reported. When he reached the hallway he saw Natasha and Steve already locked in combat with the newcomer.

Hawkeye drew an arrow and sighted the man, but he couldn't get a clear shot. Between his teammates and the man's seeming gift to avoid a clear shot, Clint realized his best chance to help would be to move in hand-to-hand. As he sprinted toward them,

He then looked back to where the battle was still taking place between Taskmaster and Rogers. Clint saw the villain punch the captain with enough force to knock his cowl off, and then followed it with a round-house kick to the face. The nearly infallible man fell to the ground. After a moment's stunned silence, Widow moved in for an attack with her stingers.

Quicker than even Barton could track, Taskmaster knocked her hands out of the way and put an explosive device on the assassin's chest. She scrambled to remove the bomb and had barely pushed it off of herself when the thing exploded. The blast pushed Natasha backward with enough force to throw her into Clint. The archer dropped to a knee and caught his partner, and was nearly knocked off of his feet. He laid her on the ground as gently as he could, then frantically did a check over of his partner.

As he brushed over her and did as thorough a checkup as possible, Hawkeye realized that he was the last Avenger standing between Taskmaster and whatever it was that he was after. Slowly rising to his feet, Barton notched another arrow.

"That was a mistake," he said menacingly. With a snort, Taskmaster responded,

"I'm trembling in my boots." With a slight grin Clint raised his bow.

"Oh really? Let's see if I can help you with that." He loosed the arrow at the same moment that Taskmaster began sprinting toward him. A sword appeared in the other man's hand and he hacked the projectile from the air. Clint began to run to meet the other man. With a twist of his bow grip, Clint selected a taser arrow and pulled it from his quiver. As the combatants neared each other, Taskmaster raised his sword and took a strong slash at the archer. Barton stooped low and put his bow between himself and the sword, blocking the attack. Hawkeye followed his block with a sweep at Taskmaster's legs, but the man jumped away from his strike. The villain came again, this time with a low stab, and Clint barely managed to step back and away from the blow.

Barton came at his opponent with a wide swing with his bow, bringing the far end whizzing toward Taskmaster. The other man lifted his sword to block the archer's attack and the bow snapped in two pieces as they collided. Clint had already followed with a punch with his left hand that caught Taskmaster squarely on his jaw and made him stumble backward.

With a cocky grin, Hawkeye pushed his attack by bringing up the arrow he had held in reserve. Bringing it over his head, he jumped forward and brought it down toward the crown of Taskmaster's head.

Suddenly, Clint felt like he was moving in slow motion while his enemy moved normally. The other man neatly stepped backward, out of Barton's reach, and brought his sword up just enough to catch the archer mid-fall.

The electric arrow fell forgotten out of Clint's reach as the blade made a sickening lurch into his abdomen.

Taskmaster held opponent upright for a moment, then he removed the blade and let Barton fall to the ground.

"Pathetic. I have what I came here for. This - all of this - has been a test, and the Avengers have _failed_. You're weak, all of you." Clint tuned the monologue out while he tried to clutch at the wound with his left hand. With his right, he weakly attempted to reach one last arrow. Taskmaster crouched in front of the downed Avenger, bringing his mask in close. "And to think I considered you 'Avengers' a challenge. I could have walked in here, killed the lot of you, and left without the slightest effort."

It was difficult to focus on his enemy's words when his heart was pounding so loudly. Then Clint realized that the quickening _boom, boom_ wasn't coming from inside. It was coming from his left ear, which was pressed firmly to the floor. He let a smile slowly spread across his face and looked Taskmaster in the eyes.

"You may have beaten most of my team, Skeletor, but I know that there's one member you still haven't beaten." Taskmaster looked defiantly confident for a moment, until the rhythmic crashes became too loud for him to ignore. "Between you and me, buddy, the Gentle Giant gets sort of violent when he's angry. And _somehow_, I'm getting the feeling managed to make him angry," Hawkeye wheezed. He then lay his head back down and closed his eyes.

The next time Barton opened eyes, he saw several of his teammates surrounding the intruder and beating him six ways from Sunday. Then he looked up and saw Natasha crouching next to him and grabbing at his wound. He closed his eyes again.

Clint's eyes remained closed for a while after that.


	6. Aftermath

They took turns watching Clint. Tony would wake up at three in the morning, unable to truly sleep, and sit by his bed until well after sunrise. Thor would come in almost immediately after Stark had left, and he would stay there for the rest of the morning and into the afternoon. Bruce would tentatively sneak in and stay for the rest of the day. Finally, after Bruce had fallen asleep next to the archer, Steve would come in and spend the night with him.

The team took Clint's injury differently. Tony nearly worked himself to death on improving the tower's security systems. Thor forced Jarvis into helping him repair the entirety of the building. Bruce destroyed all of his sleeping pills, then began familiarizing himself with every medical article on treating stab wounds that he could get his hands on. Steve made sure that his team were all taking care of themselves, but didn't take care of himself. Natasha simply disappeared. Finding her was just one more thing added to a long list for the team leader.

* * *

One night, as Steve sat beside the archer and worried at a loose not in the upholstery in his chair, Clint woke up. Steve jumped out of his chair, sending it toppling to the ground, and knelt next to the bed.

"Clint!" He said quietly. The archer gave him a weak half-grin, then glanced around the room. He swallowed, then croaked out,

"Nat?"

Steve looked around the room helplessly.

"She's . . . asleep," he said, deciding not to reveal the absence of Clint's partner.

"So you mean she's gone," Clint rasped with a knowing smirk. Silence stretched between the two for a moment. Finally, Barton said, "You look like crap. When was the last time you got more than two hours of sleep?" With a shake of his head and a smile, Steve answered,

"It's been a while, I guess."

"You've got to get some rest, Grandpa. It hurts just to look at you."

"You're one to talk, Cupid. You snore like an ogre." Hawkeye chuckled, then laid back against his pillow.

"So, what happened to Beastmaster, or whatever his name was, anyway?" Clint asked. Steve described to him that they had taken the man down and he was now in a secure holding cell somewhere in Tony's basement. Or, he had planned to. But then he woke up and realized he hadn't actually said anything about what happened. Barton was looking at him with an eyebrow raised and an annoying smirk on his face. "Go to bed, Glamor Pants. I'll hold down the fort here." Steve opened his mouth to protest, then decided against it and left the room.

He returned in a moment dragging an old cot behind him.

"I'm going to sleep a little, but you aren't getting rid of me that easily," he said to Hawkeye's unasked question. Then he laid down and finally got some sleep.

* * *

Natasha reappeared later on. That night, in fact. While Steve slept in the corner of the room, she slipped in quietly enough that even the super soldier couldn't hear her. She stood at the foot of the bed and watched Clint's face for a few silent moments, as she had every night since she "disappeared".

After checking Clint's records, making sure that he looked comfortable, and feeling useless while she watched her damaged partner, the Black Widow prepared to slip out of the room as quickly as she had come. She reached the door when she heard someone say,

"Stay."

One word, barely a whisper. She tensed in her shoulders and slowly turned. What she saw both reassured and concerned her. Clint was sitting up in bed, staring at her without blinking.

"You woke up." Not a question. Stated as though she was talking about the weather.

"And you disappeared." There was a challenge in the archer's voice. Daring her to defend herself. The other sound in his voice, the hurt, is what stopped her. She took a step toward his bed. "Steve's working himself to death keeping everybody in shape. You shouldn't have made it worse by vanishing on him."

"I needed to. You were in good hands." The justification sounded weak even to her.

"I could have been in better. But those hands decided to take a little vacation." Again the challenge. Again the pain.

"Clint-" he cut her off.

"We're part of a team now, Nat. You can't just _leave_ because I got a scrape. There are others here that need taking care of." Natasha didn't have a response for that. She stared at her partner for a long time, neither moving, neither speaking. Barton finally broke the silence. "Are you back? They need to know. _I _need to know. Are you here or not?"

She stayed silent. Clint sighed and turned away from her. She walked to the bed and sat down.

"I'm back." She said it barely loud enough to be heard. He slowly turned back to her and gave her a stupid grin.

"Good. It sucks when you're gone." She couldn't help but smile to mirror his.

"You're an idiot," she said with a quiet laugh.

"Good thing this idiot is so darn lovable," he answered.

* * *

The next morning Steve woke up to find that the room was devoid of a certain annoying genius. He jumped to his feet, concerned about the break of routine that his team had fallen into. Looking around almost frantically, the captain checked all of the windows, confirming that there was no crisis in the immediate vicinity. Then he turned on the TV and flipped through news channels. Seeing no dramatic battle being displayed on any news station, he gathered his bearings in the room. Everything was exactly as it was when he had fallen asleep. Clint's heart was still beating strongly and nothing seemed out of place.

Nothing but the assassin that was lying next to Clint.

Steve stood up straight and felt the blood drain from his face when he noticed Natasha's death glare. Without a word the super soldier left the room and joined the other Avengers, where Tony immediately began mocking him for being the last to notice the Black Widow in the room (Sam, who had come in early that morning, had actually been the first to notice her, seeing her when he checked on Clint, but Tony would never tell Steve that). Thor laughed, his mouth full of Pop-Tarts, and Bruce chuckled and finished his article on the most recent advancements in gamma radiation technology.

* * *

Natasha lifted her head up to watch Steve almost run from the room. Next to her, Clint shifted and put an arm around her shoulder.

"He gone?" The archer mumbled behind her.

"Yes," she answered. "Now go back to sleep."

"Alright. As long as you'll still be there when I wake up."

"I'll be here." The assassin laid her head down on the pillow and let herself fall asleep.


End file.
